This computer of mind can sometimes be so frustrating.  All it takes is a quick miss-hit with my old and clumsy fingers and what I have written  is gone, or I'm in a new format that I struggle to get out of.  It seems that it has such a mind of its own, and I am seeing my life living itself out without me being involved.  In reality, I feel  that way other times and in other ways too.  I know that 'agency is real, but sometimes circumstances have the power and we just observe, or at least, that is the way that it seems to be.  Maybe that is what is meant by 'the best laid plans of mice and men'.  I guess that I am not the only one who encounters that.  So I need to just deal with it, do what I can do, and hope for the best.  After-all, where I am right now in my life is really a pretty good place.   Sure, I miss the energy of my youth, and the chaos of our earlier raising kids family time, but being a little slower and a little older does have its advantages.  Might I boldly suggest that we are both a little wiser, too?  On Saturday we went to one of Spencer's basketball games.  His team got whooped by a much bigger team.  After the game we said bye to him and I noticed that he was quite upset.  I had watched the game through my detached grandfather prospective so I was a bit surprised by his reaction.  I guess I shouldn't have been.  He is a competative young man.  But I did say to him that he needed to develop patience, after all, he is only 12!  But that is what being 12 is for.  With the experiences that he is having now he will get there much quicker then I did.  Seems like there is so much more expected of the youngsters these days.  I just hope that I can be effective in the part that I can play.  Oh, and at the same time mind to my own business, because I am certainly not 'there' yet myself.