I put off Sunday night until Monday morning again.  I just felt that I would be able to figure out what was going on in my head better given a night to rest and recover.  Sunday's tend to muddle me some, especially when I have such an involved and intense moment like teaching my priesthood  lesson.  It fills me up so much and then when it is over I get sort of drained and dull.  Anyway, it took almost until the very end of my night of pondering to figure it out.  After sitting up and then laying back in bed I found the spark that I had been looking for.  Can't say that I found an answer to everything, but for today and right now I feel energized and with purpose.  Before I opened up my blog I read Shelli's and Cicily's and I understood even better how much I am me and they are them.  And even though they are a part of me it is still me and myself and I that I have full stewardship over and that I must determine what it is that I really, really want.  That may not make much sense to you (whoever your are) but it does to me and I hope that it sustains me for at least this next 24 hours.  I need it.