So, BYU men's volleyball team is in their conference tournament.  They are the number 1 seed, but nearly laid an egg last Saturday night against the number 8, Hawaii, but squeaked it our in 5: 15-13. Then tonight they play UCLA the number 4 seed.  BYU loses the 1st 2 sets and is down, but, miracle of miracles, they come back again and win 15-13 in the 5th set!  I had switched channels a few times figuring that it was over, but they showed enough to give me hope so I hung in there until the end, which hardly ever seemed a sure thing, but in the end the whole place (they were playing at home) was rocking and they all went crazy when the last pint was scored.  Now that it is over I am starting to feel spent.  But you know, maybe it shows that I am not as old as I think.  Sure, physically I am, but when I can sit at home and watch it is a good thing.  I was going to write 'just watch', but I wasn't just watching.  I was in to it (except for the times when I gave up and changed the channel).  I have come a long way in dealing with my disappointment when 'they' lose, but I also do enjoy it when 'they' win.  It adds something, but I still need to temper it against those things which really matter.  I think that I do that pretty well now, after all these years, and virtually thousands of games, won and lost.

 

Before the match my day was very full.  Haven't had this much work in a long time.  It is a good thing too, but as with the games, I value other things more then my work.  I feel very blessed there too.  But there is the rub.  There are so many wonderful going on that it makes me focus on what I can and ought to be doing (not to 'earn' them, but just because of who I ought to be) and I don't see me 'there' yet.  But I am working on it, and I really believe that I am so  much closer then I have been.  There is satisfaction there along with all the dissatisfaction.  And I am feeling positive about the journey and really enjoying the opportunity that mortality is for me.