I would like to be able to answer all of the needs of my children and grand children.  I would like to, at the least, answer the needs of my wife.  But I don't.  I have fallen into a routine that revolves mostly around just being here in my office or in my bedroom reading.  I don't feel like I have much contact with my family, at least, during the work week.  I don't even get out of the house much.  So my journal becomes more important to my mental and social health and, I hope, fills a need for the limited number of family who read it.  I know that my mind is full of thoughts of my family throughout my days, but I do try to keep on doing my thing which mostly revolves around you-all, but does have obligation to things and tasks that have to be dealt with and do take me into the world and away from family which is the more important thing.  As I have often referred to in recent entries I am at a really strange stage of my life.  The word that I use to try to describe it most often is 'overwhelming'.  There is just so much going on that this new year, as new as it is, is really different from last year for me.  I don't begrudge this new regimen because I see it as progress and a major step in a positive direction.  But it is even more 'overwhelming' and it will take some more time to get used to it.  I'm going to just keep going, and any observation or advice from any of you will be received graciously.