This month of October is pretty near over.  November is a little more of a shock to me then the other months have been.  I'm looking at the tail end of 2011.  That will make 67 years that I have touched.  And I'm not sure that I have this mortality thing figured out yet.  It seems to be moving way too fast for me.  You would think that I would be used to it by now, and I guess in a way I am, but that being said it isn't any easier to deal with in some ways.  As I think about it I do realize that there are things that I figure I am good and almost wise in.  I am able to accept some things much better then I once did.  But even then one can experience frustration  without giving in to it.  I guess that I do that alright.  I was sitting here in my office while Sheila was doing the trick or treating.  All of a sudden I realized that the ball game on TV and the other stuff I had been flipping through really had no appeal for me.  The one thing that I wanted to do before I ended my day was do some more reading in my book.  So I finished up so work that I wanted done before tomorrow and I will go up and read.  When I get up in the morning this month will have gone on beyond anything I could do to change it or add to it.  It will just have to stand the way it is, and I will have to do better and more with November.  If I let it I could get quite down on myself for all of the months that I have let slip by as less then they could have been.  But really all I have is my now.  And my now will soon be Tuesday's now.  I hope that I will be able to make it more memorable then regrettable.  

We'll see how that turns out for me.  At least my desk calendar is pretty much a clean slate with opportunity for me to live it as I will.